"Good character is more to be praised than outstanding talent. Most talents are, to some extent, a gift. Good character, by contrast, is not given to us. We have to build it, piece by piece - - by thought, choice, courage and determination". H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

It took me awhile to get a handle on this quote. Obviously, I chose it so it had some sort of meaning or connection for me, but it's taken, like, 4 days to wrap my head around it.

What I've realized is there was some confusion for me on what is good character and what is likable behavior. And by that I mean, if we build character by thought, choice, courage and determination, along the way, we've got to be ruffling a few feathers and in doing that, our we someone of good character?

For me to think of myself as someone of good character, I want to be liked but that doesn't mean I want to be a people pleaser with low self-esteem and self-worth; it means I want to be respected and of value to those around me, because they know I chose what I did at the time, based on the information available to me and in doing so, I chose wisely.

It can be hard to surge forward with our lives knowing our actions could potentially cause undo stress or harm to those we love and that's where my wanting to be liked usually comes into play. To know my actions have that kind of power, and to then makes choices in my life based on how they will affect others, shows good character. They matter. It makes me feel more connected to the world and in some way, I'm doing less harm.

Of course, life's not perfect, and I may, in the long run, unintentionally do things to harm others, but there's something about getting into the game with heart in the right place that makes it all okay. Sometimes, there's just no accounting for some of the twist and turns life brings our way.

Like yoga, character building is a long-term, ever changing process and it's those people in our lives who will reflect back to us our conduct and history and for whom we need be the most grateful.